I Won't Leave You Part 2: Step Up And Get Some Or The Crotch-shot conflict
Lonliness was considered dead after the events of "I Won't Leave you" but in reality, he had just gone into a 2 year long coma due to a shrimp overdose at Joe's Ultra Fat Buffet Reality Show, after waking up, Lonliness thought that being Emo-Like was overrated and decided to turn into a rough ex-cop with an attitude, he began wearing what every rough ex-cops have, a stained white undershirt, some dirty jeans, and a 9 o'clock beard and began going under the name "Lonli T. Wipeout" and "Sarah" for friends. Tyrin had died years ago in a slay accident but was rebuilt as a robotic cop, and so he was then known as "TyCop". 3 Years later and the city of Pokeland (Michigan), had turned from a fairly big city, into a huge metropolis, too big for the lawn enforces to cut the grass of every suburban home, and law enforcers to keep the peace. And so a terrorist group that called themselves the "California Air Nazis" was ready to take over Pokeland and turn into a huge ice cream factory. The Air Nazis's zeppelin hovered above the tallest tower in the city, the "Crotch-shot Plaza". Inside the zeppelin, Colonel Swag a german californian Weavile was giving a speech to his troops: "Alright gentlemen, we are going to show ze world how us California Air Nazis sponsored by Mountain Dew operate at a grand scale...our objective is to take over the Crotchshot plaza and there we will set up our QH, zere we will operate the rest of ze plan to turn this city of chaos into a new golden era of delicious ice cream in all 74 flavors...remember men, kill when necessary, and if you find anyzing interesting, bring it to me, I don't want like last year, where it was a bloodbath of fat woman period proportions and you people just kept bringing me junk, except you Joe, I liked those big fuzzy dice, I hung them in my car like you said, a bit pompous but zey look good..." "..." The soldiers stared "Oh...you still here? GO GO GO!" The Colonel ordered, and so the soldiers jumped off the zeppelin one by one, and they all landed on the roof of the crotch-shot plaza, and from there the soldiers infiltrated the tower shooting guards with their Pokémon abilities or their far more useful and rather expensive, but with no shortage of cool, military weaponry. By the end of the day the tower was under full control of the Air Nazis, they had also taken hostages, mainly workers, the media did not take long to arrive, media choppers and police choppers surrounded the building, from one police chopper a voice came: "You are surrounded, free the hostages and give yourselves in, or we will be forced to use brute force" Right at the top of the building, Colonel swag was seen with a megaphone "We are sorry, but no one is going nowhere...this is just beginning of a new era...and you cannot stop us...for you see, we are the last remains of a truly free and just world...while you serve a corrupt government filled with lies..." "Doesn't every bad guy say the same about every government they are against?" "What? b-but...THIS IS DIFERENT! AND I AM NOT ZE BAD GUY!" then the colonel pulled out a radio from his pocket "Execute plan Big load, and we should get some new names for these plans..." "Ya mein kommandant" the radio answered and the zeppelin above the building launched hundreds of missiles that took down all the choppers and turning the small surrounding area into a wasteland. The next day, at Lonli's small messy look-at-me-I-am-a-careless-single-lonely-man apartment, someone was knocking on the door, Lonli who was lying on the sofa asleep after a long night of watching crappy public TV and smoking so much that would give lung cancer to a Koffing. "Knock Knock" (If you understand this then congratulations! you know how a knocking on something sounds like) "Urgh...go away...I don't buy anything that you sell...not anymore...Zzzz" "Knockity Knock~" "N...no...Jerry if it is you, the fleshlight is under the mat ZZZzzz" "Knock you dig?" "Urgh..." Lonli got up, he had ash and cigarette butts glued to his cheek and some stuck in his fur "Fine...Fine..." he picked up a bottle on the way to the door, took a swig, the strong and poisonous flavor of the drink was enough to make him puke on the floor "Urgh...I'm never drinking this shit again..." he dropped the Sunny D bottle and opened the door: "Yeah?...What the flying fuck..." there was a robot at the door, it was bulky but looked awfully familiar. "I am TyCop, I once was known as Tyrin, but I have been reconstructed into a Nintendo certified killing machine equipped with tip of the line military hardware..." "I think you mean Top of the line..." TyCop exploded killing everyone in the area...Just kidding, that would actually be more interesting of an outcome. "Yes...TOP of the line, sorry, is just that my speech enabler is a bit loose today..." TyCop rubbed the back of his neck, scratching the paint of his slick silver chassis. "So...you are Tyrin..." he stared into the robot's lifeless eyes, the robot stared back... "Yes...my dea-" "mmkay..." Lonli shrugged "Alright so what do you want from me tin can dude?" TyCop became emo that day. "So what is it that you wanted from me?" "The city has been attacked by a terrorist group called California Air Nazis" "Ah...California Air Nazis, I remember them...they killed and ate my parents in Christmas eve right in front of my eyes...They are okay" "We need you to stop them..." "Why me? I am just a rough ex-cop who saw his mother die in his paws" "Didn't you say they were killed by the Air Nazis?" "Oh...em...let's just go, we will take my car" "Why don't you take me?" "Sorry but I am not into robots..." "No, I do not mean that, I mean that you can ride me" "I said I am not into robo-...Oh now I know what you mean" Lonli hopped on TyCop's back as he turned into the Tymobile, then the Tymobile took off driving through Lonli's apartment window and landing straight on a school bus to then it hit the road. Back at the Crotch-shot tower, Colonel Swag was speaking to all the hostages that were tied up sitting in a corner scared to death: "Please, do not fear, we just want to bring the Ice cream business to this cursed city, we do not want to bring harm to anyone in this city, including you...yes we may have killed an entire squad of cops, along with some media, and some nearby hobos BUT...I promise we won't cause any more harm to this beautiful city...okay, now set them on fire" and so the hostages were soaked in gasoline and set on fire: "Em...Colonel? you think this is ethical?" A soldier asked "Mmmmyeah why not?..." The soldier shrugged "I dunno" Tycop and Lonli were on their way to the crotch-shot tower but from the surrounding buildings Air Nazis showed up carrying rocket launchers trying to shoot them down, Lonli drove Tymobile up a building wall avoiding the rockets all the way to the roof where some Nazis were holding up, Lonli hopped off and karate kicked a Nazi taking his rocket launcher and blowing the other Nazis to bits, Tymobile changed back to TyCop, and took down the rest that were at the other building across the street with a rocket of his, but suddenly a Nazi chopper showed up carrying laser canons that fired right away: "Launch me!" Lonli ordered to TyCop, the robot grabbed Lonli's tail and launched him into the air towards the chopper, karate kicking the cockpits windshield and snapping the pilot's neck taking control of the chopper: "HAH I rule!" but then Lonli spotted a truck full of Nazis arriving, Lonli fired the lasers blowing up the truck, but 5 other trucks showed up across the street, TyCop intercepted the trucks, punching every single truck turning them into wreck, but some of the Nazis in the trucks survived and got out of the wrecks, armed to the teeth, they all began to shoot at TyCop, bullets, rockets, lasers all flying towards TyCop, but he activated his shields that blocked most of the projectiles, Lonli came to help in his chopper but it was shot down by a Nazi with a rocket launcher: "Shiiiiiiiiiit" he screamed as he jumped off the cockpit hoping that TyCop would pick him up, but no robot showed up and landed face first on the sidewalk: "Urgh...not my day..." he got up, he noticed that his nose was bleeding, and his muscles felt sore but other than that he was just fine, he noticed a Nazi trying to slip out of the battle, Lonli quickly checked on TyCop who had everything under control, punching and kicking every Nazi into gibs, Lonli then chased after the Nazi who had taken a shortcut through all the rubble. Lonli followed the Nazi to a bar where most likely went into for hiding, but when Lonli walked in, he saw an empty bar, he walked in having a feeling that he would get hit in the back with a shovel knocking him out, then wake up tied to a chair in that bar's basement ready to be raped by 2 freaks in gimp suits. "CLANK" Lonli fell onto the floor knocked out, that day he learnt that feelings are not always right, because he was hit with a crowbar, and he too was wearing a gimp suit when he woke up tied to a chair with a big headache: "Look at that Billy Blow Job, our little furry friend woke up" said a Banette in a gimp suit "I see that Earl" said a Hitmonlee in another gimp suit "Oh damn..." thought Lonli "So who goes first?" asked Billy "You were first last time Billy, It's my turn now!" said Earl "Yeah but I was first because you had your thingy stuck in the zipper!" Billy laughed before Earl angrily punched him in the face, and so they started fighting. While the 2 gimps were fighting Lonli looked around the room trying to find a way to get rid of the bondage, he then spotted the Nazi that he was following, It was a Charmander that had his tail shoved down his throat with the word juicy written on his naked butt cheeks with black marker, that sent shivers down his spine, but then he spotted something shiny, it was a glass shard near the Charmander's dead?..alive? unconscious? ...I do not know, but all I know it was more raped than Harry Potter in his fanfictions. Meanwhile the redneck raping Pokémon (that is the PERFECT name for a band) were still fighting: "I will shove those crotchless panties up your ass!" "Not if I eat them first! they are edible!" "Oh you and your fancy lingerie! you bastard!" Lonli got up, picked up the glass shard, sat back down and cut himself free: "Something does not feel right..." Lonli thought, but there was no time to think, he quickly sneaked out the basement picking something that would help him on his quest. Lonli met back with TyCop who had taken care of the Nazis, but when TyCop saw Lonli in that gimp suit TyCop pointed all his arsenal at him: "TyCop It is me! Lonli!" TyCop's robotic pulse began to shake "Lonli?...I am sorry...Is just that I am terribly afraid of gimps and gimp suits" "Why is that?" Lonli asked "Well you see...my father was a gimp...and my mother, and they wanted to be a gimp too and wear gimp suits everywhere...but I always wanted to be a clown, but my parents would not allow that, and they locked me in the basement for 2 weeks" "That is how you developed a fear of gimp suits?" "Yeah...but..." TyCop added a cute pink rainbow on Lonli's head "Now you are not scary!" "Right...let's go" "Wait...but won't you take that suit off?" "I am mighty comfortable in this suit..." wiggled his tail "It is warm in this!" "You scare me..." And so the 2 heroes took off to the Crotch-shot plaza. "Colonel Swag! Colonel Swag!" a soldier cried out as he ran up to the colonel holding a report "What is it soldier?" Colonel Swag grumbled "The latest reports-..." "Keep it to yourself soldier...I know what is going on..." the colonel faced the window next to him. "You do? how?" "I feel it...we are winning right?" "Eh...no..." "Burn him" The 2 heroes were on their way to the plaza, they were so close that one of them got a stiffy: "Don't look at me, I am a robot" "I can't help it, this gimp suit is amazing!...Oh yeah and the plaza..." Around the plaza was a wasteland filled with rubble and bodies of pokemon but something was wrong, some of the bodies were moving, ZOMBIES...okay, how many times have I used zombies in my fanfics...let me see...just about 3...alright then let it be 4! So yeah zombies, because before the bombing there was a waste disposal building and they were currently holding radioactive goo capable of fulfilling your scientific and sci-fi needs. The zombies all turned their attention to the 2 guys and then charged at them: "This has turned from a buddy cop movie to a horror movie" Lonli sighed "Since when does buddy cop movies have robots and nazis?" "....a sci-fi buddy cop movie?" "Is this one?" "Beats me" and then both got into the fray with the zombies, TyCop began blasting zombies with his full arsenal of rockets, lasers, and bullets blowing zombies into gibs, Lonli got on top of a zombie and hopped from head to head to the very center of the horde, where he pulled out what he had picked up from the bar, a dildo chainsaw, he turned the chainsaw one and began cutting limb by limb, zombie by zombie until there were none but from that pile of zombie limbs, a giant skeleton zombie raised and tried to swat Lonli with it's huge bone hand but TyCop got in between and karate kicked that hand, the giant zombie stumbled backwards and summoned fire hell-dogs that crawled out of the ground ready to bite, Lonli tossed his chainsaw into the air distracting the hell-dogs, and while they were distracted Lonli kicked the crap out of everyone, just in time to pick the chainsaw, but he missed and the chainsaw fell onto the ground and since it was on, the chainsaw bounced around roaring like an vicious beast, Lonli quickly stepped away, everyone did: "Shit Fuck! TyCop pick it up!" Lonli ordered The chainsaw kept bouncing around until it bounced into one of the dog's head killing it, making the dogs run back into the holes they came out from, the skeleton face palmed: "Oh great, now they will kill me when they find ou- W...what are you doing?!" the skeleton snapped at TyCop who had picked up the dead dog and was trying to rip out the chainsaw which was stuck in the dog's skull, causing a huge mess. "P...put the dog down!" the skeleton took the dog from TyCop's hands "you know what they will do to me when they find old bill like this?!" "The name is old bill?" Lonli snickered "What's so funny? you are the one in the gimp suit, please, I should be the one laughing, but I am not because you tried to be a Milla Jovovich and ended up being as good as in the movies she stars in, causing this mess!" the skeleton carefully removed the chainsaw from the dead dog's head and handed it over to Lonli "There, now please stay away from our turf" and so the skeleton went back to the hole he came from. Meanwhile at the top floor in the Crotch-shot plaza colonel Swag was eating some wavy potato chips: "I don't know why zey even make these, zey are pretty much ze same as normal ones" Back to our heroes who were inside the hall of the plaza, and it was oddly empty: "You would think there would be a welcoming committee" Lonli wondered but then spotted a couple of boxes and a tired soldier sitting next to them: "Sorry...this freaking plaza has about 100 or so floors, we are still moving our equipment all the way from the 100th floor to the bottom...and the elevators are out, so unless someone has a jetpack, it is going to be almos-" TyCop grabbed Lonli and took off with his jetpack flying through the ceiling of the hall and through the other floors up to the 99th floor. "GODDAMIT!" the soldier snapped "Why did we stop here?" Lonli asked "I have run out of fuel" "I thought you said you use batteries instead of fuel" "Disconnecting..." "GODDAMIT!" Lonli kicked TyCop "Don't leave me hanging!" "Hey whatever is going on down there! Stop it! Modern family is on!" a voice came from upstairs. Lonli quickly tried to run upstairs but he was stopped by a group of soldiers who were pointing their guns at him, Lonli tossed the chainsaw in the air distracting...until the chainsaw got stuck in ceiling, the soldiers attention went back to Lonli, and then proceeded to beat Lonli senseless, but while they were beating him Lonli got to kick one of them in the crotch, the soldier clutched in pain and Lonli took his gun and the soldier as a shield, the soldiers tried to shoot him down but all the bullets went to the human shield, Lonli tossed the dead soldier through the window and shot the soldiers down one by one when they were reloading after emptying their clips on the dead soldier, but one soldier survived the gunshot and pulled out a Assnade and tossed it at Lonli. Assnade a kind of grenade that instead of exploding, it curses at whoever is closest: "YOU FUCKING PRICK!" And then explodes The explosion sent Lonli out the window but managed to hold onto the dead soldier who he had just tossed out of the window, the soldier was now a zombie and was trying to climb back onto the room we was previously in, when Lonli realized that, he quickly climbed on top of the zombies head and hopped to the window above him, which it was on the 100th floor, inside Colonel Swag was watching Modern Family: "Hahaha Oh If I were homosexual I would totally marry a guy like-..." Swag noticed the gimp at his window who was starring right at him with murderous eyes. "I thought Christmas was not until December" the colonel said "You are dead!" Lonli charged at the Colonel, but then he pulled out a gun and pointed it at Lonli "I am sorry but I am afraid the one who is going to die is you...wait did I load this thing?" Swag checked his gun, Lonli quickly low kicked Swag who fell onto the floor dropping his gun, but he quickly pulled out a detonator before Lonli could get his paws on him: "I would not do that...If you try anything else I will blow zis whole building with us inside..." "Wouldn't that ruin your plans, which is what I am trying to do?" "Yes but you would die and tonight there's a psych marathon" "NOOOOO!!!" "Zat is right...now please...tell me your name...before I have you burned to death" "The name is Lonliness T. Wipeout" "Vonderful name...but...tell me something...what does the T stand for?" "Total...Total Wipeout" Lonli stepped on Swag's foot and snatched the detonator from his hand, before jumping out of the window and pressing the detonator, blowing up the whole plaza killing everyone inside in a fiery blaze of ultimate destruction. "Oh fuck I forgot about-" but then TyCop flied by and caught Lonli "Wait a minute, I thought you had run out of fuel..." "I thought YOU had run out of fuel" TyCop said "I won't even question that..." The End Category:Fanfiction Category:Fan Work Category:NSFW